Tree Hugger

Ok so this isn't me, but i can not say that i haven't hugged a tree. The proof is in these ridiculous pictures i found at my mom's house.

I just needed a DVD...really quick, just a drop in. Of course everytime i go to my mom's it's never really quick and it's never just a drop in.

As i was walking in i caught a glimpse of an album on the top shelf in the garage. Ah, i'll explore later. Right now I am on a mission to get what I came for and make a run for it. haha.

My curiosity far exceeded my need to be speedy so of course before I went along my merry way i had to take a look. I had to see which album this was. I was hoping it would be one of all of us when we were little cause i love to reminisce old childhood memories. That is what i was hoping for however I had a strong sense that i was wrong. Well I was. Nonetheless, I was still going to look through it. I got up on my tippy toes, stretched out my arms and grabbed the album, careful not to let it fall on my head. Yes indeed they were. Old memories. Well it doesnt matter what those pictures were. But among them i did find a picture of me.. well haha 4 pictures of me hugging a tree in different poses. Oh my gosh. Why? I love nature. Period. My hair was braided with beads from a trip I had just taken. I had braces too.

Recall back to your favorite childhood memory... or even your favorite recent memory. Where were you? what were you doing? what mattered to you or what didn't?

I began to think of how my life was so different back then, how things have changed drastically throughout the course of the years. Beliefs, attitudes, priorities...just to name a few. Then i thought of my story, our stories as humans and how these stories are written.

This really amazing woman asked me if my story was written by me or if it was written by God.

Oh. Well that got me thinking. I don't really answer questions very quickly. It takes me time cause i think a lot. In my head i thought, well shoot, I think i write it just because i've made such a mess of it. Hmm... but then i kept thinking. Words like beauty and desire started interlacing within my contradicting thoughts, and purpose and testimony.. and others.

Ok i was ready to answer. God did. He wrote. He is writing it. I sighed deeply. There you go. That's my final answer.

I thought of how even as little people He put desires within us like tree hugging and singing and longings that are real and are supposed to make there way back to Him...that way we can have something called a Sacred Romance. A what? I always thought that was only possible between two people in love. I think it still is and when right it represents this big umbrella that brings this whole relationship with us and Him together.

But somewhere along the way it get's a little mixed up and a bit sidetracked. I am figuring it out. Desires are filled by everything but Him. Deception makes it's sneaky way into our heads. It's a difficult struggle...like a tug of war of ambivalence...a battle between should and want.

I ask myself how on earth is it possible to re-route these desires so they link to Him? Oh geez... i am not sure. Maybe praying some will help. Writing it down... possibly. People. of course. I love learning from people that know way more than me. maybe i should hug a tree again...different age, different season in my life, better now than before. and it keeps going.